Whenever I see my friends with their parents it saddens me. Imagine sharing a meal or a laugh with my family can only exist in my imagination; my parents got divorced when I was just twelve. The news came as a shock to my brother and I when we were having dinner. Everyone in the room fell silent, my parents were anxiously waiting for our response. Breaking the silence, my brother stood up abruptly from his seat which grated against the cold hard marble floor and made a beeline to his room. My heart was broken like a chandelier that had fallen from the lofty heights of the ceiling. The words escaped the tip of my tongue, “I… I don’t understand..” Rivulets of tears streamed down my cheeks as I waited for an answer. From that day onwards, my life was never the same.
In the weeks following after that dreadful day, father’s belongings became lesser and lesser until there was no more. It felt as if his presence in the household was just a mere memory, a part of me felt empty. My mother told my brother and I why they had gotten a divorce, however that young and innocent me still could not comprehend the situation. I was bereft. I would sit staring at a book without turning the page for an hour, I would eat what was put in front of me and I would smile when my brother made a joke but, I would not cry. It felt as if my father had abandoned me.
Eventually, I got better. My relationship with my father improved as he brought me out for dinners and movies once every week. It was difficult at first; mostly awkward but we managed to pull through and now, I will regale to him the events and happenings to me in school and will invite him over to the various school ceremonies. However, seeing with my friends with both of their parents at ceremonies were heartbreaking. Some of them complain that it is very embarrassing for their parents to be there but I reckon they had no idea how lucky they were to have them both.
As fervently as my brother and I had wish our circumstances were different, we were changed the moment those words left my parents’ mouths. We may look the same, the change was not visible but we were changed completely, forever. Change is something normal, something people all over the world experience. I used to cling on what things were instead of letting them be what they are, I used to cling onto old memories instead of making new ones. Change is constant. How we experience change is up to us. It can feel like death or it can feel like a second chance in life.
Up till now even though I come from a background where my parents are divorced, I still believe in love and marriage. I am not someone who will just break down and feel that it is futile hope to have a future. I believe what my parents had for the last nineteen years together were special and meaningful, and that is why I know that that event had shaped and strengthened me more when it comes to the topic of love and marriage. I will not allow my children to grow up without a father like I did and I will show them what it means to have a happy family.
